Aine Sherlock/Personal log

	Personal Log 239809.18

This leave has been a little up and down. Much to my surprise, Sil transferred to the Resolution. I thought he was happy on the Juneau. He'd met someone and seemed content...I don't know. Anyways, we were loaned the Excalibur to go to Bajor. That is one impressive ship. The Captain served there before. It's so big. Well, I mean, there's bigger ships in the fleet, but compared to the Res, it's massive! I know sometimes I complain about the lack of privacy on a Nova Class, but a ship the size of the Excalibur, just seemed...lonely. With the way our missions have been going, I'm sure Captain Rainier would rather we have something with more teeth.

Bajor was nice. I don't know if it answered my questions, but it at least made me feel better about them. There's less doubt. Before we left, I got promoted. So I'm a full Lieutenant now. The Captain also "reassigned" me...to Chief of Security. I'm excited. But, I felt that feeling quickly replaced. I need to take this seriously. I need to step up in all aspects of my life. I never planned for this. I never expect this. But if the path keeps leading this way, I need to leave behind my "doubts." Speaking of, Sil. When we talked on DS224, I never did give him an answer. Then he transferred. And the whole time on the Excalibur he was acting off. I know he's got history there. And I'm still not sure. But perhaps we'll see.

Also, it looks like the rumors of the Captain coming down with something have been verified, to an extant. Doctor Adea has been made acting Captain. Luckily, it's just a patrol of a sector in the Borderlands. Nothing major. As far as I know, it's his first time in the big chair. Maybe a routine patrol is good for it. And for me.

End log.

	Personal Log 239808.22

I don't even know where to start. We were out in the Borderlands doing some routine surveying when we came under attack. It was an old, and I mean like over 100 years old, Klingon ship. I won't go over every detail, but basically we were reliving the same scenario over and over again. In the end, it turned out there was a Q who'd trapped us in some sort of space/no-space box. He said it was some sort of test. Whatever. It was just a sick little game of his. It's like he has no concept of the limited time we have in our lives and what exactly that means to us.

I have so many questions. There was one point where the Resolution was destroyed. The shockwave from the core ripped the ship to pieces. Just as there was fire coming through the bridge, I heard the bulkhead over me collapse and then everything went black. Next thing I knew, I was opening my eyes with my head laying on my console. I had died. I haven't really feared death. Worried I'd die, sure. But I always assumed there was more. What does it mean if the things I was told as a child just weren't true? If there was nothing after this, then what's it all for?

I'm going to try to move forward from this. Try to find some meaning in it all. We're scheduled to leave for Bajor, aboard the Excalibur. Iljor's home. And it's a very spiritual world. Their faith is strong. Perhaps there's answers there? I don't know...I just don't know.

End log.

	Personal Log 239807.06

This shore leave has been up and down. We helped get the Romulans setup on Oreen V. The existing colony is pretty small. They've got a long way to go until livability becomes easy, but they'll get their. I got the chance to talk to Commander R'mor...Talar...he's chosen to resign from the Star Navy and stay with the colony. He said he was tired of loss and wanted to help grow a future for their people. It seemed both sad and hopeful all at once. That was the up.

Mel, um, Lieutenant Martinson...showed up on DS224 unexpectedly. When I first saw him, I lashed out a bit. I don't think I handled it too well. But I gave him a chance and we met up to talk. I still feel sick to my stomach. He didn't know anything about what I did. I don't know what he felt about it all, but he came back again, at Molly's. He clearly was more emotional than I'd ever seen him. He grabbed me to take me away and it scared me. I just froze. I'd never seen him that aggressive. Before I could even think, Meidra had subdued him. And no doubt because she was involved, Security thought we'd started it all. To his credit, he did tell Security it was his fault and they released us to Commander MacKenzie. Contrary to what I'd heard about her having to bail out other crewmembers from the brig, she seemed very calm and understanding. I know at times she can be abrupt, but I'm thinking it's because she actually cares more than she's willing to show. She's definitely on her way to making a fine Captain.

I honestly can't wait to get back to work and put this all behind me. Duty has a way of refocusing me. But before that, it looks like we have a party for the crew coming up.

End log.

	Personal Log 239806.17

That mission was a doozy. We found a few of the survivors from the Hanno and one of the Romulan ships. It was a real tragedy considering the two ships they had were full of refugees. On the flip side, and because the Res needs so many repairs, a few of us are helping to build the settlement for the Romulan refugees. It may not be a full colony, but to them, it's the world. And, it's something I've always wanted to do, visiting Romulans in their own element. I was able to make some friends among them in the days we were on the planet. Sub-Commander R'mor is a stalwart leader. He'd lost his wife on the second ship, but he still always stayed strong for his people. I hear he's leaving the Romulan Navy to help with the fledgling colony. I guess they're the only family he has left.

The Skarn turned out to be quite nice and helpful, well, once I'd taken care of their leader that is. They seemed like a megalomaniacal leader. Just wanted to feed us to a pit monster of some sort. I'll, for sure, not be telling Ma and Da about this one.

We're taking the Gemini to the new colony. I've read about it a little, apparently it's had a pretty illustrious career before being assigned to DS224. I'm looking forward to this leave. I heard the station has an FMC Theater and I may catch a holo. One thing I'm definitely going to do, is get some travelers quarters. We don't have water baths on the Res and a soak followed by some Lifetime holo's while sleeping in a bed that's too big for one sounds perfect.

End log.

	Personal Log 239805.18

Well, we're about to head into another nebula. This time it's the Briar Patch. I guess it's a nebula? I'll have to read up on it more. All I know, it's dangerous. But I think we're more prepared than when we last went to Celendi. Having seen enough, in my short time so far in Starfleet, I'm not so nervous this time around. In fact, I'd say I'm feeling pretty confident. The only thing I'm not so sure about is the Romulans. While I'm more than happy to help find their mission ships and people, I'm still suspicious. My instructor at the Academy in The Romulan Mystique was a Romulan. And I trusted him implicitly. But even he said not to trust Romulans. Their whole society is based on secrets. But I guess that's a problem that's yet to show up and we'll deal with it when we get there.

End log.

	Personal Log 239805.03 Supplemental

I can't believe I did that. I messaged Mel last night. I'm such an idiot. I really wish Meidra was here to talk. But she won't be back from Trill for a few days. I really hope he just deletes the message, but I'll never know. Unless he responds. Oh god, what if he responds!? Ugh, this is a mess. I hope the ship gets fixed soon so we can get out of here.

End log.

	Personal Log 239805.03

So, you will not believe this. First, a few of us went out for a night on DS224, it was ga-reat! I haven't had that much to drink in a loooong time. I got to sing some old songs I used to sing back home. Iljor met a nice Orion girl. But anyways, when we left, Meidra's grandfather showed up and pulled knife on her! It was tense! Pretty sure he got arrested.

I think I had too much to drink. I'm not sure what it is, maybe all the stuff with Tai, but I'm missing Mel. I mean, I hate Mel, but I'm missing him. Anyways Personal Log, I'm gonna sleep this off.

Night.

	Personal Log 239804.21

Well, that was horrifying. I taught my first self-defense class today. At first it was a lot of fun. People were really getting into it. No serious injuries. My ribs and jaw are sore from Crewman th'Chaorhith's fists. I thought it'd be a good idea to have Meidra teach some Vulcan techniques and, well, I'm not sure what happened, but she accidentally broke her boyfriends arm.

Doctor Adea was definitely not amused. He's expecting a report in the morning. I'll get it taken care of before we go out tonight. More than ever, drinks are needed. The flip side is that he doesn't think it requires intervention by either the Captain or Commander MacKenzie. So, I guess it's an isolated incident. Initial reports show that Dwich is alright. But more than anything, I hope he and Meidra work through this. I already feel bad for getting his arm broken, I hate to be the cause of their relationship to break.

Onto that report.

End log.

	Personal Log 239804.06

I. Cannot. Believe it. Commander MacKenzie got them to agree to something! Turns out the Nascaik AND the Thama each have something that's threatening the health and future of their people. The Nascaik are even returning a couple colonial planets to the Thama...slowly...but still, they're making a peace offering. In all honesty, I did not expect that from the Nascaik. Things really are never what they appear to be on the surface. I actually got to see it happen, right there on the bridge. I've studied a lot of diplomacy, but as they told us, you learn more from experience. And seeing Commander MacKenzie in action, well, that was a great lesson. If anything a lesson in how to keep your cool when things are falling apart.

The Doc, engineers, and science crew seem to be making headway in getting the ship back up and running to full spec. Apparently, whatever Koas unleashed, caused an allergic reaction in the bioneural gel packs. That's a bit above my pay grade. But still interesting. I remember reading about viruses having similar effects on them. Another note for the future.

From the sounds of it all, once the two groups sign the treaty, we'll be off for shore leave. The Resolution herself could use some care. She's still got a hole in the side of her.

End log.

	Personal Log 239803.25

So, this "diplomatic" mission...the Nascaik I was assigned to BABYSIT! Are absolute shite! Ok, yeah, so you're from this big bad military race...who's conquered very little space compared to EVERY. OTHER. POWER. AROUND. YOU! But YOU requested our assistance, you could show a little gratitude instead of y'know, threatening to "splorch" off our ship. Arses!

But that's not even the worst of it all! Turns out one of the Thama...is a damn TERRORIST! They sabotaged our ship and kidnapped the Nascaik's Rossk. We were so blinded by the Nascaik's aggressive tendencies that we completely missed what was going on right under our noses. Wait...maybe that was part of their plan all along...DAMMIT!

And Tai, I'm not sure what's happening there. He's been acting strange since we got back. Like when I'm working, he seems to always be...distracted. I'm not sure what it is. I'm not doing anything of the sort. I'm too busy working. Maybe will need to have a talk with him and Meidra about it after this DISASTER of a mission is over.

END LOG!

	Personal Log 239802.02, Supplemental

Well, that proved interesting. The food was great. I may have had more than a couple drinks. Don't worry, it wasn't anything I couldn't handle. I just got a little...frustrated, is all. There was a new crewman. He just came onboard. Ensign Etan. When I introduced myself, Tai suddenly became a little jealous. Wasn't exactly warm and friendly with the new guy. I'll have to make sure I apologize for that. I just don't get it. I mean, yeah, the new Ensign's handsome and all, but I just met him and gave little more than a "hello."

Anyways, we had a surprise for dinner...the CAPTAIN! She seemed to be recovered from whatever had happened to her. Starfleet doesn't seem to think so though. They've grounded her for an undetermined amount of time. It's total B.S. Oh god, I hope this is my Personal Log! Ok, safe. The Captain made the night even more special. Some of us, including me, got awards for our actions on Saural V. Doctor Adea got a Gold Livesaving ribbon! That's just amazing. Though I'm sure Ensign Treetus wishes it wasn't necessary and that he hadn't lost an arm for it. I, personally, got the Explorer's Ribbon and First Contact Ribbon. Quite an achievement, if I may say so myself. But, honestly, that wasn't how I hoped my first time with first contact would have gone.

Oh! And how could I forget! I got promoted! I am now Lieutenant Junior Grade Sherlock. That came a lot faster than I ever expected! But, even with the excitement, this means more responsibility. And not being afraid to voice my opinions. Every step comes with more expectation, is what we're told. I can only hope I'm up for the challenge. Time will tell.

Time to get some rest.

End Log.

	Personal Log 239802.23

Rock climbing was amazing! It was such a beautiful view! Those crystalline structures on the Fire Plains of Raal were like nothing I'd ever seen before in my entire life! Tai was a good climbing companion. He's actually quite nice. Not pushy at all. He seemed a little guarded, though I'm hardly one to speak. We had lunch at this wonderful little place. They served real meat even, something I haven't had in a few years since leaving home. But, it tasted odd. Not so sure about those Vulcan meats, they're vegetarians after all and they just serve it for the benefit of those visiting. I also got some neat little placards from the "Ghost City." Apparently they're plentiful since they sell them at the market. For all I know, they're just replicas. But they'll make nice bookends. Tonight is dinner at the Ambassador's house. I'm really looking forward to it. I haven't had much alcohol in the last few years, but I think after that crazy mission, I deserve a drink. We'll just keep it to one.

Time to get ready. Going a little dressed up, but nothing formal. No dresses, thankfully, nor uniforms.

End Log.

	Personal Log 239802.02

Well, that was fast. Apparently, I've caught the eye of one of my fellow crewmen. He was on Saural V with me and the team, when Ensign Treetus was injured. He said he was impressed with my skill. Not sure what that means, I was just doing as I'd been trained to do. But it's nice to have a little personal recognition. I don't know if it'll go anywhere. And, I'm not entirely sure I'm ready. But who knows. Maybe getting a little uncomfortable is a good thing. We've made a couple plans together. I'm excited to go rock climbing. It's been a few years now since I last did, and even longer since "the arm" incident, Ma'll never let me live that one down.

Before we get there though, I've got some administrative stuff to take care of. New counselor. That always makes me a little nervous. It was hard enough to open up to the Academy counselor. But in the end, it helped a lot. So, maybe I'm just making excuses. I'm hoping the doctor has something for these bug bites. They won't stop itching! What I wouldn't have given for Saural V to be an ice planet! At least on those, it's big things trying to kill you and you can just shoot them. And then there's shuttling training with our helmsman, Lieutenant Yogan Yalu. He's about the biggest Trill I've ever seen! Granted, I haven't seen too many of them. But still, huge guy!

Doctor T'Suran has sent out an invite to her families estate, she's from Vulcan, at least, her father is. That'd be nice if most of the crew can show up. Apparently, he's an ambassador. That'd be pretty fun to be able to say, "Oh yeah, I went to the Ambassador's house, it was relaxed, not formal at all." I'm sure not many Ensign's get to do that.

Anyways, I've got some work to do. The day to day of Starfleet. The parts not in the brochure. Y'know, cleaning phasers, cataloging gear. All that jazz. I think we lost one in the future. Pretty sure Ensign Treetus dropped it along with part of his arm. Sure Temporal Investigations will love that one.

End Log.

	Personal Log 239801.30

The shuttle from Starbase 118 to the USS Resolution was, thankfully, uneventful. When I arrived at Deep Space 224 the ship was just about to depart for their current mission. I literally had to sprint from one docking bay to the other! I wasn't even sure my personal crates would make it there in time. Somehow the crewman got them to the ship on time. But even then, I didn't know until after the mission.

I was on the turbolift to the bridge when the call went out that a briefing was about to start. It seemed that I caught our First Officer, a Commander MacKenzie, just in time to check in and follow her into the briefing room. Being just out of the Academy, this crew seemed relaxed. Almost too relaxed. No one stood at attention when the Captain came into the room! It kinda left me in a slightly embarrassing moment of half-standing, half-sitting looking like I was bending over the table. I guess not all ships are quite so formal as were told in training. That's something I'll have to get used to. With my counselor at the Academy working with me on separating work life and personal life, I'm a little nervous to let the two blend again. I feel like I've got two personalities I'm dealing with and in a way, that's comforting. Going back, not so much.

Anyways, we went looking for a lost freighter, the Andalucia. Turned out it got caught in some sort of temporal distortion. I don't know enough about them to be specific, wasn't my strong suit in school. Anyone who ever listens to this, you'll just have to ask those science officers, with all their know-how, about it. Long story short, we got caught in it too. Ended up something like 300,000 years in the future. It's so unbelievable. It almost doesn't seem real now. And at the time, I'm not afraid to admit, I was terrified. What if we couldn't make it back? Well, disappearing on your first time out, well, that would have just proven dad right. So, maybe I'll leave out those details next time I talk Ma and Da. We found the crew, or what was left of them, along with others who'd be brought from who knows when. We were able to extract a couple hundred and make a break for it. Somehow, we made it back.

Unfortunately, something happened to our Captain. Medical is being pretty hush-hush about it. I'm not sure if it's for security reasons or they just don't know. But they've determined that the best treatment for her is on Vulcan. So we're heading there now. This will be my first time on a truly alien world. I've heard it's hot, but a dry heat.

End Log.

			REV SD 239809.19