SIM:Jaxx-From a good day to the worst
((Brig, USS Apollo))
::The small party had been a success. He made a mental note to give Sid a proper 'thank you' for playing his gopher in setting it up. He had just given the rundown on what they knew, and what they were walking into. He checked the time as the officers began to file out of the Brig and head to their stations. There would be an incoming runabout carrying their new Helm Officer, and he wanted to make sure he got aboard before they reached the rendezvous point. Johnson had taken a break due to the loss of his sister, and had already departed. Jaxx weighed his options moving forward. Heading into a potentially hazardous situation, he was not sure how he felt about putting a fresh officer behind the helm. He knew that the Academy prepared them for any scenario, and his cadet cruise no doubt got him ample experience. If the situation became hostile, they would need to act fast. There was no way for the new officer to get up to speed with the various attack patterns and capabilities of the Apollo. Jaxx knew that he would have to rely heavily on Ra if things went south when they arrived in the system.::
::After the room was clear, he glanced toward his XO, and could not help but look at his pips. He remembered when it was not that long ago when Liam was his new officer, and just earned his first one. Now he was sporting three full pips, and though there was still more they could learn from each other, it was going on a year since Liam became his XO. They had developed a great working relationship, and a decent private one. Jaxx made a conscious attempt at making friends among the crew, but it was always a hard thing to do when you had the power to order them to their death if needed. There was always part of him that had to keep them at arms length, and it was harder when he was romantically involved with one of them. He was in his second relationship with a crew member, and it was still something that made him uneasy at times. This one was different, and easier to manage. Sid was the ship's counselor, and it was a position that Jaxx held when he was a green Ensign. They had a common background on many levels. They were both raised on the same planet as well. It made things a bit easier to adjust to in his private life.::
::With everyone gone, the only people left in the room was Jaxx, Liam, and the brig officer. He smiled at his XO as he noticed the man give a nod to the brig officer. Jaxx glanced as the man left the room, leaving the two most senior officers alone. Slowly, Jaxx felt his happiness for Liam slowly fade. He could sense the feelings within Liam, and it started to worry him slightly. There was a mixture of so many emotions emanating from the man, that it was hard to pinpoint which was the strongest. He could tell that something was on his mind, and was curious what it was. He could tell that whatever Liam was struggling with, was important. Looking at his XO, he spoke with a reassuring smirk.::
Jaxx: What is it, Liam?
::Jaxx kept his trained eyes on Liam as he drew in a deep breath. It was more confirmation that whatever he was about to say, Jaxx was most likely not going to like. There was a slight hesitation, but the words slowly began to flow from Liam. Jaxx kept his eyes on the man as he spoke.::
Frost: While you were out, I got a call from Admiral Tilano.
Jaxx: ::snickering to lighten the mood:: I am sure you did. I would assume he was not entirely happy about my condition? He is a long time family friend, and if my father starts to worry, the Admiral starts to worry. It is catching with us Betazoids.
Frost: He hoped you were doing well. You might want to call him about that, by the way. But he also had some news to deliver.
::Jaxx was curious at what type of news he would call to deliver. StarFleet Command was not usually in the business of relaying messages that were not duty related, even for a family friend. Jaxx paused for a second, finding himself trying to guess what the news would be. Clearly the man in front of him had the news that was given, but his curious mind would not stop searching for the answer before it was provided. He found his eyes drifting slowly from Liam and scanning the room. It was a nervous habit he found himself doing after his coma. His eyes would drift and scan everything, trying to verify that what was happening was real. With no signs to show otherwise, he looked back to Liam.::
Jaxx: Okay, I assume you have the message? ::raising his eyebrows::
::The emotions coming from Liam intensified dramatically. Jaxx could feel everything that the Terran man in front of him was feeling. The shared emotions did not leave Jaxx anticipating the words about to be spoken, in a good way. If it was something that Liam was dreading to say, then Jaxx really knew that it was going to be something he was not going to like. He started mentally preparing himself for every possibility. Was something wrong with his father? He was getting old, but he still had a fire within him. He never slowed down for anything. Jaxx always used to joke about how his father would outlive him. Quickly, this thoughts drifted toward his mother. If something was wrong with her, his father would have been the one to call. It was the same thing for his brother, who was on Betazed with his mother. The logical choice of all of them was his father. As a member of the Federation Council, he was on Earth. The Council was in session, and Jaxx had spoken to him not that long ago.::
Frost: A two days ago the USS Poseidon discovered what was left of a survey ship near the Neutral Zone. The ship was carrying a scientific research team.
::Jaxx lowered his brow. When a starship became involved in the conversation, the focus was no longer on his father. He found himself searching the words, trying to pick out the key words or phrases used by Liam. When he heard "Neutral Zone" he knew it was not pretty, given the current situation between the Klingons and Romulans. The second phrase that stuck out was "what was left." It was something that signified that what once was, was no more. The final word that he phrase was "scientific research team." When he put all of the words together into one coherent thought, he had a feeling about what Liam was going to say.::
Frost: The officer in charge of the research team... It was Tressa.
::Jaxx felt his arms drop to his side. All over again, he was looking around the room trying to find something to let him know it was another dream or vision in his coma. The feelings were too real, and he could not doubt the validity of this reality. Nervously, he picked his arms back up and crossed them in front of him. He and Tressa had ended things on good terms. Their relationship would not be able to survive, but they were able to remain friends for the sake of the twins. It was his idea that they be with her, stationed on a starbase. While the two of them were on the Apollo, it made sense for them to be aboard. But things would have been more stable for them on a starbase, so with Tressa they went. He wondered who was taking care of them, and if they knew. Now more than ever, he wanted to finish the Apollo's assignment so he could pick them up and be there for them.::
Jaxx: Do they know how the ship was destroyed?
Frost: They don't know for sure yet, they're still investigating. About half the lifeboats had been launched, but they haven't been found yet.
::It was a standard question anyone would have asked. It could have been a malfunction of some sort, or even a spatial anomaly. Jaxx knew first hand what sort of damage they could do to a starship, let alone a small research vessel. His thoughts drifted once more to Tressa's parents and if they had been notified. He was sure by now someone from StarFleet had been in touch with them. His thoughts were scattered to so it took him a second to pick up on the word "they." His eyes grew as large as they could, and he could feel the tears begin to form as he felt deep feeling of fear come over him. His eyes struggled to find their way back to Liam.::
Frost: I hate to be the one to tell you this. It was considered a low-risk mission. Andrus... the logs say she had the twins with her.
::There was no greater pain he could imagine than having to hear those words. They pierced through his heart like the Hirogen blade that was once destined for it. It was his decision to send the children with her. He did not believe in fate enough to assign the blame anywhere else. All he could see is a panic on the small vessel and people scrambling to the escape pods. He envisioned Tressa running into a room to get the kids just as the ship exploded. The imagery was strong, and just played over and over in his mind. First, he was in a coma and completely helpless to assist his crew...now this. He felt as if he was losing control of his life, and it was in a constant, downward spiral. The feelings of pain, loss, and anger brewed within his body. He was so numb he did not know what to think, or which feelings to embrace. He could feel the tears streaming down his face as he stood in silence. He choked on his words as he struggled to talk, but got the words out.::
Jaxx: Thank you for...::swallowing hard as he continued::...we uh, we have a job to do. Can you get our new, uh...::nodding:: I will be up on the bridge in a little bit. ::pointing behind him:: I am just going to regroup...
::Turning away from Liam, he did not wait for a response. He found himself walking blindly through the brig, until he heard the door swoosh closed behind Liam. His first urge was to take out his pain on the wall. Somehow, turning his emotional pain into physical pain would help him take his mind off of the fact he just found out his children were missing, and presumed dead. Guilt set in, and he felt horrible for caring more about them than Tressa. It was the cold truth. If it had just been her, he would have been able to handle it much better than he was. The thought of potentially losing his first born children so early in their life was overwhelming. He stumbled into the last cell in the brig and plopped down on the bench. With his hands on his head, he looked up and allowed himself to cry. There was nothing he could do but feel the pain and emptiness he was left with. He struggled to calm himself down, knowing he still had a job to do. All he could do was prevent himself from slipping further way into darkness. Part of him wished he had never woken up from that coma, at least then he would have been spared the torment he now had to face.::
TBC
Fleet Captain Andrus Jaxx
Commanding Officer
USS Apollo, NCC-71669
Captains Council Magistrate