SIM:Feraoun, Zayar/Learning Curve-Ship of One Fool
(( Ready Room, USS Constituion-B ))
- Zayar walked into the Commander's ready room and took note of the décor. It was stocked with everything a Starship captain could ever want. A bar, large view screens, ample seating arrangements. A bit too 'Starfleet' in the appolstery and carpeting, but coming from a people that made, hands down, the best rugs in the universe, to expect the same caliber of a 'lesser culture' as his grandfather (half) jokingly said, was impossible.::
Faranster: I assume you came for a purpose other than to admire the decor?
- Apparently Zayar took too long looking around for he heard the sound of the Commander's voice.::
Feraoun: His voice was a bit harried.:: Oh, yes, sorry Commander... or... Captain? :: His voice was a bit indecisive, but not unclear or childish and was a bit serious, like a dignified, but lowly official asking the forgiveness of a great leader.:: I'm sorry if I caused offense.
- Having grown up in a society where respect for one's elders was the only acceptable choice and then having transitioned to military life and later, an occupation that demanded humility and respect when encountering foreign, especially tribal, leaders, Zayar was still formal, though not rigid, in his responses to his superiors.::
Faranster: Depends, I suppose. Commander or Captain, when I am giving orders. Some people would disapprove, but I prefer Shel or Shelther when not on duty. For right now, call me Shelther.
- Variability in address, not something many of the leaders Zayar had encountered in his day used. But it would be unfair to compare the captain of a Starfleet ship to a warlord, wouldn't it?::
Feraoun: :: His eyes faced downward, with his hands behind his back, though his tone wasn't a groveling one, he was merely a creature of habit. Showing difference and respect was just as much polite, as it was good health among people with leaders who might be adequetly described as 'despots'.:: Of course, I shall remember that in the future.
Faranster: I don't think you came to talk about what I prefer to be called, anymore than you came to admire my decor. So, take a seat and tell me what's on your mind.
Feraoun: Yes, I... came to talk to you about, what you see my role as in your... power structure. :: Zayar's word choice left much to be desired, he still thought in academic terms.:: No that's not right...
Faranster: Well, since neither of us are Engineers, the warp core would be a strange subject of conversation.
- Zayar ignored the quip, though it was a good thing to know that his commanding officer had some sense of humor.::
Feraoun: :: Zayar, for the life of himself, could not figure out why his nervousness was peaking at the moment, he didn't recall being like this last time he interacted with Commander, Captain, Faranster. The recent events had taken a certain toll on him however.:: What I meant to say was, what do you see me doing in the future? My job description is perhaps understandably vague.
Faranster: That is a good question. Mission Specialist does seem a bit vague...
Feraoun: And a bit open ended for someone who has no experience aboard a starship, or any certifications or qualifications outside his chosen field.
- Zayar liked what he did for the fleet, what he formerly did that is, and he had built his skill set around it. This meant that his skills were less variable than the other officers around him and he had no need to expand them until a few weeks ago.::
Faranster: Well, you were assigned here because of your specialities, your science background and your expertise in the area we are stationed in.
Feraoun: :: Zayar spoke more directly, breaking his tone of formality.:: So how does that translate to application aboard a starship?
Faranster: What I expect, is when we get assigned a mission, you will be given the information, and you will be expected to know what the mission is about inside out. Since you know a lot about this area, you should be able to apply your information to the mission at hand.
- Zayar let the Commander continue.::
Faranster: After you research the mission, when I am briefing the staff, I will be relying a lot on your input for the mission. It is an important job, and if you are have any doubts about your capabilities, you should tell me now.
- Valuable as his knowledge might be, Zayar himself was hardly an asset to the Commander. He wrote lengthy reports that took months of observation, immersion, and he did not draw the types of conclusions the Commander would no doubt expect of an officer in a crisis. Zayar's journals would be of more use. He couldn't come up with any solutions back in the science lab, it was either Faranfey or Sivah and he couldn't help them chose.::
Feraoun: I'm an academic, Commander, an intrepid and well traveled one, but one none the less. :: Zayar paused for a moment.::
Feraoun: It's just... :: Zayar reclined in his seat as he formulated his next sentence.:: I've spent my career not forming opinions, because my job demanded objectivity, a clear head. I couldn't be tied to the interests of the Federation if I wanted to present the people I was observing in the right light. :: Recalling the events of the past mission.:: When Lieutenant Phos and I found out that there was a quarantine, well after everyone else, the coms didn't work or something, I kind of panicked because not only should I have sensed the havoc on the ship, but the systems that were supposed to alert me to eminent danger didn't work. Things I relied on, failed me, nothing happened as a consequence, but what if the stakes were bigger next time? What of instead of a communications system failing, it was me?
Feraoun: :: Zayar's tone was direct, a little musing, but not immature or whiny.:: When we got to the science lab, I couldn't offer any expertise, any judgment on what to do. I just pushed Lieutenant Faranfey and Ensign Sivah to just chose something, and they couldn't decide. The crisis was resolved and what we could have done, wouldn't have mattered, but what if it did? What if my indecision, my unwillingness to get involved, cost people their lives?
Feraoun: :: Zayar nodded, he did indeed fear being the weakest link.:: Yeah, you could say that. :: Zayar leaned forward.:: You need the best, Commander, I don't know if I'm one of them... :: Zayar breathed heavily for a moment and then muttered.:: ...yet.
Feraoun: I'm... :: Zayar once again took a deep breath. His heritage was not something he discussed openly.:: I'm El-Aurian, Commander, I 'listen', I pick up things quickly and I'm able to retain them; languages, lore, history, ideas, concepts, theories. I used my abilities to observe groups, but I can also pick up things from individuals, like what drives them, how they think. I think if I spent more time with the other senior officers, I could pick up more than a thing or two.
Faranster: So, you think by observing some of the senior officers, you'll make a better Mission specialist?
Feraoun: :: A bit shaky, trying to gain some footing.:: I think I could learn, Commander.
Faranster: Your plan doesn't seem to have a downside, as long as it makes you a stronger officer, I approve.
Feraoun: :: Zayar gave a single, affirmative nod.:: Thank you Commander.
- Zayar wasn't sure if the commander felt there was any sort of risk in this exercise, but he clearly had some faith in Zayar, which in a way, made him feel better about going forward.::
Faranster: Right away the people I'd have you shadow are Lieutenant Udas, Lieutenant Commander Williams, and Commander Tel-ar.
Feraoun: Of course Commander, in any particular order?
Faranster: Lieutenant Udas would currently be where I'd start you, since he's your department head, you can talk to him about shadowing him. I will approach the other two about letting you shadow them for a few days.
Feraoun: :: A little stiff.:: Thank you Commander.
Faranster: Was there anything else?
Feraoun: :: Zayar rose from his chair.:: No Commander, and thank you once again...
- Bowing his head, Zayar turned and walked out of the ready room. He felt good about the direction he was moving in, though time would tell if it would be beneficial or not. At least with the crew on shoreleave, he had time to exercise his mind and tentatively develop some of his own skills. Climbing into the turbolift, Zayar rotated his head and ordered the lift to his quarters, where he would at least attempt to get some sleep.::
(( Zayar's Quarters, Deck 15 ))
- Zayar made careful annotations in his journal about the events of the past 24 hours, there wasn't much to report but habit demanded that he write something. He wrote privately of his meeting with the Commander and his idea for his future progression as an officer. He needed to adapt to this new environment, and needed to come into his new role, and there was nothing inherently wrong about seeking the consul and advice of others. He had seen too many people fall to pride and not heed or at least seek out the advice of their peers or subordinates. While they had been kings, chiefs or leaders, Zayar was a lone man, but this was the only suitable parallel he could think of.::
- As he sat writing his recollection of the day's events, Zayar's eyes grew tired and he dimmed the lights and set the pen and paper aside, resolving to finish this entry at a later date. The important facts had been entered, that was all that mattered. And he softly drifted off to sleep.::
- Zayar was awoken some time later by the sound of his door chime. Sitting up in bed, Zayar was still a little dazed from his sleep and stumbled a bit out of bed as he journeyed towards the door.::
- Letting the chime ring again, Zayar played with his hair a bit and straightened his shirt out in the mirror before answering. Going over to the door, he answered his guest as the doors opened and light streaked into his dimly light quarters. At first blinded by the sudden intrusion of the bright lights of the corridor, Zayar couldn't make out his guest, but the effects of the light soon wore off and Zayar was greeted to the treat of the sight of a figure he hadn't seen in year. He instantly, instinctively smiled at the sight of her, though this was hardly a genuine response. What she was doing here, Zayar did not know, but it probably wasn't going to be all that pleasant for him.::
oO Damn... Oo
Ensign Zayar Feraoun